Did you know I worked on a Grammy Nominated Album. Well here it is! A Great live Jazz album. What an amazing night! This album was recorded in a 30 seat small blackbox theater and we all had dinner together afterwards. Wynton told me my cake "tasted like his grandmother made it". He He He... It bugs me out, the "House of Tribes" an amazing little space that had ALOT of problems. But this day it was a GREAT place!
So the other day.... I was at my homegirl's son's birthday party. I saw an old mutual male friend that I hadn't seen since last year.
We exchange friendly hellos, hugs and kisses...catchin up on things, ya know.
So then...he gets quiet and simply stares at me, shakes his head slowly, with a somewhat disappointed look upon his face.
I ask..homeboy, what's good? What's up? Why you shakin your head?
He replies, "what's up ma" as he motioned toward my hair.
I was like, "what you mean...what's up...what's the problem?"
He answers, "You're such a beautiful woman...what's the point of this?"
This brother was actually referring to my crown (hair).
I had to take a minute to digest exactly what was going down.... the fact that my friend was really pondering hard, and looking at me in such a way as if I had three green heads.
I laughed, in spite of my own silly thoughts on this knucklehead.
So I answered back, "What's the point??" "The point is... I'm loving ME, every bit of ME".
He looked at me with a slight strangeness... and I answered again.
"I'M LOVING & EMBRACING EVERY BIT OF ME"
And you know I had to accompany my statement with a sista-girl neck bob and finger snap!
Oh yes I did!
He chuckled. But I was very serious. And he knew this.
So I asked him, "do you feel the same way when your mama walks around with her naturalness??" "do you feel that way when your son rocks his fro??" "when YOU had hair, did you not like your do??"
Again, he chuckled. "nah Jas...I'm just saying"
I was like, "nah brother...what exactly are you just saying??"
"Have you forgotten what it's like to be with a Black woman?"
No answer.
Maybe that's because his fiancee is a white woman. I don't know, just a hunch. I didn't go there.
For too many years, women in the Afrikan (american) community have traded their natural locks for more processed styles because it's more socially "acceptable".
"Oooh girl you can't get a job with your hair like that!" "Oh no, I have to get this stuff done honey..." "I can't go out with my hair looking like this" "Aint nothin cute about this nappiness"
These are just a few of many statements I have heard throughout the years from sisters, including my own mother (she means well).
In my opinion, sisters have been brain-washed to think they are less beautiful if they rock fros, or braids, or even locks.
It has been almost two years since I have put any chemicals in my hair, and I embrace my natural crown fully and happily. I have never felt more freer!
No disrespect to my sisters rockin the weaves and braving the scabs of potential burns to get that hair "silky, Indian" straight. Been there, done that.
Grandma always said, "your hair is your glory".
All I'm saying is.... LOVE & EMBRACE EVERY BIT OF YOU!
Queens.... recognize that weaves and perms DO NOT enhance who and what YOU already are... BEAUTIFUL!
Kings...if you have a sister that wants to flaunt her natural crown, don't discourage.
Embrace her...Love her...
SHE is Your very backbone.
Study your history. You will be amazed at the natural beauty of us ALL.
I was privileged to be a guest on Urban View to discuss Women in the Entertainment Industry. The show was awesome. Check out the video and please leave your comments. Also check out the links below of all of the folks that were on the show with me.
